Home » Columns » Currently Reading:

Roddy’s Rant 5

February 26, 2003 Columns No Comments


Roddy’s Rant: Guide To Surviving A Crappy Day On The Court

by Chris Roddy

With March Madness nearly upon us or at least March — supposedly the official kickoff according to my TV is March 20th, can we say APRIL MADNESS? — we must begin to think about how our favorite teams will fare in both conference tourney play and then of course, the big one (no, not the NIT), the NCAA Championship Tournament.

This is an analysis, or perhaps more accurately, guide, for dealing with an early exit.

Fans? Get over it. Part of the fun is losing and griping about it with a bunch of other fans.

Coaches? It’s part of the job requirements (along with wearing a school sweater, emblazoned with the logo, over a business shirt — uggh, can we get Brooks Brothers to class up some of these guys?).

The players? These are the guys who need mini-guides on how to console themselves. I mean, come on, some of these phenoms are only eighteen years old. National television exposure. Media junkets. Alumni relations departments trying to capitalize off players’ success. A tough, tough situation.

So, I’ve devised a list of things for players to do if bounced from post-season play. Some are pretty obvious. Others, a bit out there — I call it, Rodd-erapy. But don’t let my PhD in turning frowns upside down impress you. The results speak on their own.

1. The Wham Bam Peter Pan Method

Whenever you feel lousy, about anything, you alone have the power to change it. You are in control. For example, let’s say you were upended by a Cinderella squad in the first round. You feel terrible. Grab a pan and whack yourself as hard as you can on the foot with it. Not thinking about basketball any more, are ya? This is part of disassociating yourself with one bad thing in place of another.

Effectiveness: ♦♦♦♦ (physical pain trumps psychological)
Duration: ♦ (depending on the size of the pan, you have to keep re-upping your dose)
Pros: Low-cost, quick acting solution
Cons: Eventually you’ll have a broken foot and still be pissed about losing the game
Overall: C+

2. The Thank You Sir May I Have Another Method

Pizza? Candy? TV? Doesn’t matter what your favorite poison is; just imbibe in an exorbitant amount.

Effectiveness: ♦♦♦ (something about not eating just one, two, but three pints of Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia feels SO good)
Duration: ♦♦ (lasts as long as you can consume)
Pros: People love to have a lot of their favorite thing
Cons: Anything from a tummy-ache to becoming an alcoholic
Overall: D

3. A Selective Memory Method

People will try and console you with advice or a friendly word or two. Little do the idiots know, but now you feel seven times as bad. Plus, there is always that one guy pointing and laughing at your failures. Combat them by blocking the whole thing out. “Me? The guy who missed the potential game-tying free throw? Nope, I’m an ice cream truck driver — never played basketball before.”

Effectiveness: ♦ (hard to forget the worse day of your life)
Duration: ♦♦♦♦ (denial lasts a lifetime)
Pros: Not facing your failure might help you wake up every day
Cons: Not facing your failure might make you not want to wake up every day
Overall: F

4. The Glass Half-Full Method

So what? You just lost the biggest game of your still fledgling career and your teammates, university and state now hate your guts. Your parents are wearing sunglasses and hats in public places and you can’t get a restaurant reservation anywhere. Take it all with a grain of salt and be proud, defiantly happy. During an interview, address all the positives and always say, “We’ll be back next year. Don’t worry, we will.”

Effectiveness: ♦♦ (people this happy take a lot of prescription drugs)
Duration: ♦♦♦ (as long as your smiling)
Pros: You come across as a gracious loser and perhaps can media credibility
Cons: People will think you’re daft and clearly insane
Overall: B

5. The Standard Method

Mope and moan for a month. Feel sorry for yourself. Put on some weight. Get mad at yourself. Get in shape. Channel all your self-pity into becoming a better player. Go out and get back to The Dance. Don’t lose this time.

Effectiveness: ♦♦♦♦ (a proven winner)
Duration: ♦♦ (lasts for the off-season)
Pros: People understand what you’re going through and try to help
Cons: People understand what you’re going through and try to help
Overall: B+

     

Comment on this Article:







Subscribe to Hoopville

Enter your email address to subscribe to Hoopville

Advertisement


Hoopville Archives

College Basketball Tonight

We hope you enjoyed COLLEGE BASKETBALL TONIGHT during the 2016 NCAA Tournament. COLLEGE BASKETBALL TONIGHT is a comprehensive look at the NCAA Tournament hosted by veteran college basketball broadcaster Ted Sarandis, along with co-hosts Mike Jarvis and Terry O'Connor, both former Division I coaches. It also included many great guests, including Hoopville's own Phil Kasiecki.

The show aired on AM 710 WOR in New York City on Sunday evenings starting with Selection Sunday and running through the NCAA Tournament.

Here are links to the shows:

March 13, 2016 - First hour | Second hour

March 20, 2016 - First hour | Second hour

March 27, 2016 - First hour | Second hour

April 3, 2016 - First hour | Second hour

Coaching Changes

The coaching carousel is moving. Keep track of the latest coaching changes right here on Hoopville.

Everybody Needs a Head Coach

Former college basketball coach Mike Jarvis has a new book out, Everybody Needs a Head Coach.

"As you read this book, I hope that Coach Jarvis' experiences inspire you to find your purpose in life."
-Patrick Ewing, NBA Hall of Fame center

"Mike Jarvis' is one of my special friends. I am so pleased that he has taken the time to write this fabulous book."
-Mike Krzyzewski, Five-time NCAA championship head coach, Duke Blue Devils

"In reading this book, I can see that Mike hasn't lost his edge or his purpose. Readers should take a look at what he has to say."
-Jim Calhoun, Three-time NCAA champion, UConn Men's basketball

Review on Hoopville coming soon!

Hoopville Podcasts

Talking Hoops With Ted Sarandis – April 26, 2018

April 27, 2018 by

In our latest podcast, we spend a lot of time looking at what the Commission on College Basketball came up with, as their report was just produced. We also look at the NBA Draft and transfers, which have many rosters potentially in flux for next season.

Talking Hoops With Ted Sarandis – April 6, 2018

April 6, 2018 by

In our first podcast in the postseason, we look back one more time on the NCAA Tournament, which was just what we needed at this time. We also look at the NIT, CBI and CIT, as well as important transactions with players leaving early for the NBA Draft and coaching changes.

Talking Hoops With Ted Sarandis – April 3, 2018

April 3, 2018 by

The 2018 national championship is in the books, and with it another season of college basketball. We break down the national championship game and some of its implications to wrap up the season.

College Basketball Tonight – April 1, 2018

April 2, 2018 by

Welcome to our Final Four edition of College Basketball Tonight. In this edition, we look ahead to Monday’s national championship game, and bring on two guests – long-time Villanova radio play-by-play broadcaster Ryan Fannon and Radford head coach Mike Jones – to get their thoughts and insights on the game.

Talking Hoops With Ted Sarandis – April 1, 2018

April 1, 2018 by

In our latest podcast, we break d own the national semifinals, where one game went back and forth while the other was never really a ballgame thanks to an impressive performance for the ages by the winning team.

Phil Kasiecki on Twitter

Recruiting Coverage

Lincoln captures Hamilton Park title

August 15, 2017 by

For the first time, a public school won the Hamilton Park Summer League, and they were led by a big effort from a junior point guard in the title game.

Notes from a day at the 2017 Boston Shootout

June 12, 2017 by

Some news and notes coming from the second and final day of action at the 2017 Boston Shootout, where the host program provided plenty of talent, but so did a program that produced a team that beat them.

Notes from a day at the 2017 Northeast Hoops Festival

April 11, 2017 by

The Northeast Hoops Festival helped bring in the new spring travel season in New England, and we have notes from some of Saturday’s action.

2016 Boston Back to School Showcase notes

September 12, 2016 by

We look back at the 2016 Boston Back to School Showcase, where a couple of Boston City League teams were among the most impressive on the day.

2016 Hoopville Spring Finale championship recap

June 28, 2016 by

We look back at the championship games of the 2016 Hoopville Spring Finale, which had a big local flavor as one might have expected.